Words: Naomi Egan she/her
Trigger warnings: Blood, ED, SA
Red is the colour of viscid mouth-blood
Sucking my skin through your teeth til it pops;
Hives emerging from virgin goosebumps
Scratching at neck-stains, rubbing my thighs
Til I can detach from your smoke-choked eyes
Red is the colour of Thursday nights, talking
Clawing at tree-roots, missing my footing
Ripping the flesh in my desperate scrambling
Red is the jelly you draw from my thumb
And telling myself that I relish the burn
Red is embarrassment, rightfully earned
Red is the colour of lovely anguish
Carnivore, greasy, fatty, delicious
Cursing your mouth and abhorring your kiss
Red’s losing minutes hand over fist
To sceptical thinking and
Paranoid drinking
Ceasing only when you’ve reached your limit
Red can’t mean stop if you’ll always persist
Red is weight dropping, breaking out in rashes
And seeing you in every room that my Dad is
I can feel your presence like scattered ashes
Your phantom existence is my forty lashes
I love you, I love you, that’s what the catch is
Red is slaver, and fingers gone numb
Red is waiting for calls that don’t come
Red is mistaking indifference for love
Red is the colour of three wasted months
Red is of teething, red is mouth-blood
